World Heavyweight Championship
Sheamus (c) vs. Dolph Ziggler
Crowd well
behind Ziggler, Lawler looked like a fucking idiot for saying the loud and
obvious "Let's go Ziggler" chants were for Sheamus. Why must they
peddle their shit constantly and ram their way down everyone's throats. Someone
else was over, just go with it! Imagine if they reacted like that with Austin
in 96/97 when he started getting cheered as a heel. Ziggler should have gone
over here, throw a swerve in there with him getting the shot so late, and throw
someone new right into the top line mix. Ziggler is one of the top three workers
in the company (along with Punk and Bryan) and he is just incredible to watch.
His current status is criminal; he should be a megastar, especially with their
incredibly shallow talent pool. Good match this anyway, hurt slightly by the
odd botched spot, but it was exciting and the crowd helped. The result was
sadly never in doubt.
Final Rating: ***
Tuxedo Match
Santino Marella vs. Ricardo Rodriguez
Shite. What
a complete joke this was. I like both these guys but this had no place on a
PPV. Christ, it had no place on Superstars twenty years ago for that matter.
Final Rating: DUD
WWE Intercontinental Championship
Christian (c) vs. Cody Rhodes
Christian
is boring. Cody has been in this same spot for too long. If you are going to
elevate him, now is the time. I struggled to maintain much interest for this
one. It is just same old, same old.
Final Rating: **
Four Way Tag
Nice to see
a new team given the chance and a mini push, and also pleasing to see tag
wrestling given an opportunity. I guess this is one. of Triple-H's incentives,
because I heard he was high on making the division hot again. Fingers crossed,
but breath not held. Hell, it was not exactly the Brainbusters or the Bulldogs
out there, but at least it was real teams in matching gear, with a reason to be
teaming. That is enough for me in 2012. Some cool spots, and they didn't let
the uninterested crowd bother them. Fun enough, and there was some promising
talent in there.
Final Rating: **1/4
WWE Divas Title
Layla (c) vs. Beth Phoenix
Yeah,
fucking around with the tiara didn’t get over. It's because you are balls love.
Watching Layla thinking about her next spot, because she lacks any natural
ability or ring awareness, is at least good for a giggle. They just do stuff.
Nothing really flows or tells a story, like nearly all Divas matches, it is
just moves for the sake of moves. You could hear a cricket fart during this.
Should any champion winning ever be considered an upset?
Final Rating: 1/4*
Hunico vs. Sin Cara
The dimmed
lighting really annoys me. The "we want Ryder" chants during this
tell you everything you need to know. Other than that, the aforementioned
cricket is still flatulent, and we all know about it. I have never seen a
cruiserweight guy work as boring a style as Hunico. It is like watching the
Barbarian. I wanted Sin Cara to work in WWE, but the experiment has been a
disaster. Poor match, despite the odd athletic spot.
Final Rating: *
WWE Championship
CM Punk (c) vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Kane
Shame they
ruined this by adding Kane. I can only assume they did it to upset the people
who would want to see the singles between Bryan and Punk again. The AJ stuff
leading up to it had actually been pretty good. Tasty little crumpet as well
isn't she? They are over these former ROH guys who "don't know how to
work" aren't they? You would think WWE might cotton on and bring more proven
workers from elsewhere in. I'm sure I am not alone in thinking Kane looks like
he is wearing his singlet inside out. Bryan is the best thing they have in the
company. The exchanges between him and Punk were as good as you would expect
them to be, just superb chemistry. Kane, not so much. Actually this was his
best match in ages, and he looked good in there carried by two superior
workers. AJ involved in the finish was expected, and thankfully she didn’t get
too involved to ruin the match, it was just at the end. Good little 3-way.
Final Rating: ***1/2
Ryberg vs. Jobbers
I still
don’t get why you would have a body like that and then cover it with a singlet.
He looks impressive, I enjoyed his squashes. Those Goldberg chants won't go
away though. You can tell it is pissing him off too, because he was trying to
make them chant "Ryback" at the start. Bless him. If they brought
back TV squash guys, maybe more of their roster would get over. It would
increase the number of fresh matches on PPV's ten-fold as well.
Final Rating: SQUASH (But a fun one)
Cage Match
John Cena vs. The Big Show
It's like
we have regressed, having to suffer Show in main events. Give it a month or two
and this push will be dead and buried. Again. Like it always has been over the
last 13 years. This is the FIFTH show in a row that Cena has main evented and
the WWF title has not. They sure do know how to elevate things. At least Cena
doesn't joke around when he looks into the camera tonight, unlike his usual
suspension of disbelief destroying nod, wink and nudge, and acknowledgement
that it is all just a bit of fun. Michael Cole said: "WWE fans". I
guess it is because Vince is at ringside and not feeding him lines. If they
released comp tapes like they used to in the 80's and 90's, would they have to
change Fan Favourites to Universe Favourites? I bet they would too. This was
like a cage match dot-to-dot puzzle, it was so basic and generic for the bulk,
not to mention boring.
Final Rating: *
Very
average show from start to finish. Some decent stuff , but not enough of it.
39/100
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